I am forgotten as a dead man out of mind: I am like a broken vessel.

Zion and Jerusalem, October 12, 2013

I am forgotten as a dead man out of mind: I am like a broken vessel.

(Old Testament | Psalms 31:12)

There are a great many of the LORD’s children who are running to and fro seeking for a stable anchor and a sure channel. They are tired, broken, sorrowful and who feel abandoned.  And like me that have said or thought like the scripture in Isaiah that says:  

The Lord hath forsaken me, and my Lord hath forgotten me

(Old Testament | Isaiah 49:14)

In my particular case, I know that the LORD knows the thought of my lonely and sorrowful heart; he knows my anxiety and that which I desire most intimately of him.  He knows that the day I claimed my right to rule, I was ignored and my right and mantle to bless posterity was denied. Today, in my post, there is no man; the seat of my patriarchal bishopric is empty.  

When I said and declared in the house of my friends that I, out of all repented sinners, had also heard thy voice, oh, LORD, my God, which voice sounds like the rolling thunder or like the rushing of many waters, for saying so, oh, LORD, I was scorned.  As Joseph of old, I was plotted against, and suddenly stolen from my household, my wife and children, separated from me by faithless and incredulous brethren.  I was taken to a psychiatric hospital by them, to be numbered with the desolate of mind and the infirm of body and heart.  When I came out, Oh, LORD, I was diagnosed with severe mental disorders I never thought or knew I had.

 Not many days after this, the day I sought for divine justice to uphold me, instead it was me, oh Lord, he who was taken into prison to be dressed in harsh fiery looking clothing and laid in distemper and despair in a bed of iron.  Charged on false and pious pretenses, by the designs of false brethren and conspiring men.  An evil report against me was produced and a warrant for my arrest was furnished, that marred tarnished my visage, and my form, more than any other man.  For thirty days minus one, I was in jail. I felt like Joseph of OLD, sold was into slavery by my own brethren, the high priest of ELKENAH, he betrayed me, perhaps for some thirty filthy pieces of silver.  Thus, was I, taken from judgment, humping from jail to prison, counted and reckoned with the violent and with the transgressor and schooled for six moons against my will like the violent aggressors; when physically and mentally, there was no violence in me.   

My last words before my accusers, I recon clearly were as these; as I lifted my eyes to heaven I shouted, have mercy upon me oh LORD!!!  And then to my betrayer, he who ate bread with me, in my house, said I to him, what is this things hast thou done?  What thou must do, do it quickly.  After a great many long days and dreadful nights, in shackles I bitterly cried and lied down on a cold iron bed as if I were a traitor.  No one defended me. I beheld them that brought me to the judgment table, even my accusers, yet I knew that in he that delivered me to justice, that in him remained the greater sin. Forgiven them LORD, for they knew not what they did.

I was mute and I was dumb, confused was I like a lamb goings to the slaughter house or like sheep taken to the shearers is dumb.  I did not open my mouth, yet I could not be or hold my peace still. I felt thy holy presence; oh Lord, I know that I trembled greatly at thy power. Thou was the only one who was with me.  

On that May Day, the time device from my wrist broke and was no more.  All reckoning of time ceased to be registered before me.  I stood alone in space time, like a broken vessel. Ever since that Cloudy evening of mental despair, I ceased not to feel forgotten, like a broken vessel, even a cistern that cannot hold water, even as those who are entrusted into the buffetings of Satan or to the fire of hell alive.  Crying by day and sobbing night was I, I wept like the condemned for want of a word of consolation.  As I walked the corridors of hell, I longed for that friendly visit or a familiar face. I had the mad hope for some prophetic deliverance, or waited for the soothing shaft of death?  Which blessing as I hoped, never came and death fled from me.  I now reason, at the suffering of my LORD in the garden, when he trode the wine press alone, even the wine vat. It was my calling and destiny to drink the bitter cup of dregs and woe that the LORD had given me.  

The experiences that followed make me recon also, when I was young lad, recently espoused.  I girded myself and went wherever I desired or where my goodly job took me. But now that I am not so young, I am jobless and another girds me; and even thou I pay no fare, I travel still and go where I do not want to or desire to go.  Then, I was but a helpless merry go round a lad, somewhat rude, but good to look upon, one who bare to expense and who dressed like a dandy. I was in error, prideful in thought, that perhaps I was desirable to some.  Then I had a palatial home, two cars in the garage and money with which to travel back and forth around the world.  Now, I have no form nor comeliness. I am poor and needy, yet the LORD is mindful of me.  He is my help and my deliverer make no delay, oh my GOD. I feel today, like a tender plant out of dry ground, lonely in the desert, like a brand plucked out of the fire of affliction, rejected of most if not all, family, friends and foes alike. Like the Psalmist felt I feel of which he said concerning me and him.

But I am poor and needy; yet the Lord thinketh upon me: thou art my help and my deliverer; make no tarrying, O my God.

(Old Testament | Psalms 40:17)

When I was vile and sinful, I tasted no pain, but now that I have forsaken my sins, I suffer great tribulations for righteousness sake.  Because I have no more pleasure in the affairs of this world, nor seek I anymore the dream of lustful youth,  my body is pained, for lack of sin. I yearn earnestly in the spirit to rest in a better world, a city which builder is GOD.  And my lifelong dream is to see thy face oh my Lord and my redeemer. Before I run away even when no one was chasing me, today, I face pain and justice, in righteousness, and even though the LORD slays me, like Job, I will yet trust in him. 

I now live from day to day, I barely make ends meet, but I am able to rejoice more than ever in the deeds and company of posterity, for earlier better than late, I learned that wickedness was never happiness.   Now, I am like the wind, I know not where I come from and where I go to, for since I had my baptism of fire, the spirit is my only guide.  I roam the world in my sleep, like a stranger in a strange, wandering among a strange people, like a spirit in search for water. Like an asthmatic in search for air.

I am not a necromancer or conjurer of the dead, nevertheless, I wander amongst the dead often, for I converse and commune with them like the ghost whisperer or as those that have familiar spirit.   In this world my friends have forgotten me and think of me that I am smitten, stricken of GOD and afflicted. But they do not know that God laid in me their iniquity, with my strips and suffering they are healed, for the chastisement of their peace, was laid upon me. I have suffered their reproach while fighting their battles. Like the Angel of the LORD’s presence, I carried them as in days of old. In their affliction, I was afflicted, and in my love and pity the LORD has redeemed them. Their reproach has fallen upon me. 

Great is the mystery of Godliness, I bear witness in spirit and flesh o LORD of thy power and of thy divinity. I am as thy suffering servant.

Because for thy sake I have borne reproach; shame hath covered my face. I am become a stranger unto my brethren, and an alien unto my mother's children. For the zeal of thine house hath eaten me up; and the reproaches of them that reproached thee are fallen upon me.

When I wept, and chastened my soul with fasting, that was to my reproach. I made sackcloth also my garment; and I become a proverb to them. They that sit in the gate speak against me; and I was the song of the drunkards. But as for me, my prayer is unto thee, O LORD, in an acceptable time: O God, in the multitude of thy mercy hear me, in the truth of thy salvation.

Deliver me out of the mire, and let me not sink: let me be delivered from them that hate me, and out of the deep waters. Let not the waterflood overflow me, neither let the deep swallow me up, and let not the pit shut her mouth upon me. Hear me, O LORD; for thy lovingkindness is good: turn unto me according to the multitude of thy tender mercies. And hide not thy face from thy servant; for I am in trouble: hear me speedily.

Draw nigh unto my soul, and redeem it: deliver me because of mine enemies. Thou hast known my reproach, and my shame, and my dishonour: mine adversaries are all before thee. Reproach hath broken my heart; and I am full of heaviness: and I looked for some to take pity, but there was none; and for comforters, but I found none.

They gave me also gall for my meat; and in my thirst they gave me vinegar to drink. Let their table become a snare before them: and that which should have been for their welfare, let it become a trap. Let their eyes be darkened, that they see not; and make their loins continually to shake.

Pour out thine indignation upon them, and let thy wrathful anger take hold of them. Let their habitation be desolate; and let none dwell in their tents. For they persecute him whom thou hast smitten; and they talk to the grief of those whom thou hast wounded  Add iniquity unto their iniquity: and let them not come into thy righteousness. Let them be blotted out of the book of the living, and not be written with the righteous.

But I am poor and sorrowful: let thy salvation, O God, set me up on high.

(Old Testament | Psalms 69:7 - 29)

I am like an island, a city surrounded by rivers with no standing bridges. Everyone turns away from me, saint and sinner abhors me for my dreams and for words.  Like unto Nephi some cry to me, you are not our teacher, nor our ruler, much less thou art a prophet of GOD. They say, we knew that there was no judgment in thee, that my undertaking was greater than me.  And they want me to take counsel from the enemy and take deadly poison and hope I die in the infirmary.   

Those of my household, despised me and do not want to talk with me. Father and mother have looked upon me sideways like an abominable branch.  I am treated like a venous reptile, the abominable of nations or a as a deadly pest.  Thus, when I came there was no man, when knocked no one opened, when I called no one answered; yet in my prayers I cease not to consider them as my only friends; and their names I punt continually on roll call, even upon the altars in the temple.

Some times I desire to rejoice, to lose my head in wine, lie the drunkards of Ephraim. but I remember my duty to GOD and chose soberness to be ready to bless the needy, the sich and the afflicted.  Like Nephi and Paul I cry, Oh, how wrecked and miserable man that I am, who shall deliver me from this body and mind of corruption and death.   But I thank my GOD thru Jesus Christ.  I know that my redeemer lives. So, then with the mind I serve the law of GOD, with the flesh I serve the law of sin.  

My heart sorroweth because of my flesh; my soul grieveth because of mine iniquities. I am encompassed about, because of the temptations and the sins which do so easily beset me. And when I desire to rejoice, my heart groaneth because of my sins; nevertheless, I know in whom I have trusted.

My God hath been my support; he hath led me through mine afflictions in the wilderness; and he hath preserved me upon the waters of the great deep. He hath filled me with his love, even unto the consuming of my flesh. He hath confounded mine enemies, unto the causing of them to quake before me.

Behold, he hath heard my cry by day, and he hath given me knowledge by visions in the night–time. And by day have I waxed bold in mighty prayer before him; yea, my voice have I sent up on high; and angels came down and ministered unto me. And upon the wings of his Spirit hath my body been carried away upon exceedingly high mountains.  And mine eyes have beheld great things, yea, even too great for man; therefore I was bidden that I should not write them.

O then, if I have seen so great things, if the Lord in his condescension unto the children of men hath visited men in so much mercy, why should my heart weep and my soul linger in the valley of sorrow, and my flesh waste away, and my strength slacken, because of mine afflictions?

And why should I yield to sin, because of my flesh?  Yea, why should I give way to temptations, that the evil one have place in my heart to destroy my peace and afflict my soul?  Why am I angry because of mine enemy?

Awake, my soul!  No longer droop in sin.  Rejoice, O my heart, and give place no more for the enemy of my soul. Do not anger again because of mine enemies.  Do not slacken my strength because of mine afflictions.

Rejoice, O my heart, and cry unto the Lord, and say: O Lord, I will praise thee forever; yea, my soul will rejoice in thee, my God, and the rock of my salvation. O Lord, wilt thou redeem my soul?  Wilt thou deliver me out of the hands of mine enemies?  Wilt thou make me that I may shake at the appearance of sin? May the gates of hell be shut continually before me, because that my heart is broken and my spirit is contrite!  O Lord, wilt thou not shut the gates of thy righteousness before me, that I may walk in the path of the low valley, that I may be strict in the plain road!

O Lord, wilt thou encircle me around in the robe of thy righteousness!  O Lord, wilt thou make a way for mine escape before mine enemies!  Wilt thou make my path straight before me!  Wilt thou not place a stumbling block in my way—but that thou wouldst clear my way before me, and hedge not up my way, but the ways of mine enemy.

O Lord, I have trusted in thee, and I will trust in thee forever.  I will not put my trust in the arm of flesh; for I know that cursed is he that putteth his trust in the arm of flesh.  Yea, cursed is he that putteth his trust in man or maketh flesh his arm.

Yea, I know that God will give liberally to him that asketh.  Yea, my God will give me, if I ask not amiss; therefore I will lift up my voice unto thee; yea, I will cry unto thee, my God, the rock of my righteousness.  Behold, my voice shall forever ascend up unto thee, my rock and mine everlasting God.  Amen.

(Book of Mormon | 2 Nephi 4:17 - 35)

Have I reason to speak harsh and stout words against GOD, wordz that reach up all the way to the heaven who are prone to be recorded by angels?  And to say that in vain have I walked mournfully, serving or fellow men and the LORD,  while the wicked, even those that tempt him are delivered? Have I ant justifiable reason to say to my friends that the LORD has forsaken me? For I can feel the word of the LORD tingling in my ear saying:

Your words have been stout against me, saith the LORD.

Yet ye say,   

What have we spoken so much against thee?

(Old Testament | Malachi 3:13)

Ye have said, It is vain to serve God: and what profit is it that we have kept his ordinances, and that we have walked mournfully before the LORD of hosts? And now we call the proud happy; yea, they that work wickedness are set up; yea, they that tempt God are even delivered.

Then they that feared the LORD spake often one to another: and the LORD hearkened, and heard it, and a book of remembrance was written before him for them that feared the LORD, and that thought upon his name.

And they shall be mine, saith the LORD of hosts, in that day when I make up my jewels; and I will spare them, as a man spareth his own son that serveth him.

Then shall ye return, and discern between the righteous and the wicked, between him that serveth God and him that serveth him not.

 (Old Testament | Malachi 3:14 - 18)

Has the LORD looked upon my offering with abhorrence and with contempt like that of Cain? Why is it that I am continually tested and tried like fire in the furnace of affliction, tempted in all things, repenting and abhorring even the day I was born, as those who are baptized in the fire of mortal combat?   In times of heaviness and sorrow, my soul cries silently and my watery eyes cease not to betray me. Where is my consolation? Like the Christ of the cross, I have exclaimed, Eli, Eli why hast thou forsaken me?

But in all truth, I ask, has the LORD forsaken me?  Has not he heard my woeful cry?   As I live, he has kindly pleaded with me in a stake solemn assembly thru the counsel of Rulon Mums.  And in a great conference of the saints he spoke to me by the mouth of  Jeffrey of Holand.  My GOD gave me comfort thru his angel, and spoke about me and my infirmities thru his messenger in the mist of a great multitude he made mention of me.  At last my comfort came. It felt like Gilead’s balm applied to my wound. I felt healed, so that all would know that the LORD my GOD has loved me, even if I am no more than a broken Vessel.  

Like Broken Vessels.

By

Jeffrey R Holand

http://www.lds.org/prophets-and-apostles/unto-all-the-world/like-a-broken-vessel?lang=eng

In the congregation of the saints, the LORD made mention of my name. He said to me, before thou was formed I knew the,  when thou were in the womb, I sanctified  thee.  By The Cook, EL Quentin, my work and toil was vindicated, his messenger my faith confirmed.  And I learned that I had not toiled in vain. Who saw where and when I sat down to cry, even by the rivers of Babylon, where a song of Joy was required of us?  Who heard where and when we wept?  Today,  I proclaim to all the broken vessels out there, the LORD had not forsaken us, even  Jerusalem and that he has at last remembered, his people, even Zion. 

Lamentations of Jeremiah: Beware of Bondage

By

Quentin L Cook

 

http://www.lds.org/general-conference/2013/10/lamentations-of-jeremiah-beware-of-bondage?lang=eng

Break forth into joy; yea, sing together ye waste places of Jerusalem, because the LORD comforted his people, and remembered Jerusalem; and he has not forgotten, Zion, Selah.  

The LORD has made bare his Holy arm in the ayes of all nations, and all the ends of the earth shall see the salvation of our GOD.  Thus:

Break forth into joy; sing together ye waste places of Jerusalem; for the Lord hath comforted his people, he hath redeemed Jerusalem; The Lord hath made bare his holy arm in the eyes of all the nations, and all the ends of the earth shall see the salvation of our God?

(Book of Mormon | Mosiah 12:23 - 24)

The LORD has also said; even to all of you who are worked and heavy laden.  Come unto me, and I will give your rest, for my joke is easy and my burden is light.  Learn of me, he has said, that I am meek and lowly in heart.  For this and much more I know that my redeemer lives.

Thus saith the LORD, the Redeemer of Israel, and his Holy One, to him whom man despiseth, to him whom the nation abhorreth, to a servant of rulers, Kings shall see and arise, princes also shall worship, because of the LORD that is faithful, and the Holy One of Israel, and he shall choose thee.

(Old Testament | Isaiah 49:7)

Come unto me O Gentiles, let us reason together, and I will show you my potent reasoning. Come now, and let us reason together, saith the LORD: though your sins be as scarlet, they shall be as white as snow.

Come unto me, O ye Gentiles, and I will show unto you the greater things, the knowledge which is hidden up because of unbelief. When you come to the LORD with a broken heart and a contrite spirit, in faith, seeking repentance and healing, the LORD will speak unto you by the power of the Holy Ghost.  And then you will be numbered with his people.  He will give you hidden treasures of knowledge, wisdom of things hidden that eye has not seen and things that ear has not heard, or even things that please you and that have not even penetrated the inner thought of man.  

Come unto me oh, house of Israel, partake of the Blessings that the LORD has in reserve for thee; for thus he has spoken, though your sins be red like crimson, they shall be as wool.

Come unto me, O ye house of Israel, and it will  be made manifest unto you how great things the Father hath laid up in store for you, even from the foundation of the world,  and which has not come unto you, because of unbelief. And he will restore the blessings of the fathers unto you as children of the everlasting covenant and sing forth songs of everlasting joy.  Even thou Abraham rejects you, you will be my people, and I will be your God.

Behold, when you rend that veil of unbelief which for many centuries and even millenniums have caused you to remain in your awful state of wickedness and hardness of heart, and blindness of mind, then will the LORD reveal the great and marvelous things which have been hid up from the foundation of the world from you.  Yea, when you shall call upon the Father in the name of Christ, with a broken heart and a contrite spirit, then you will know that the Father has  remembered Jerusalem and that he has not forsaken Zion.  And in that say he will fulfill the covenant which he made unto your fathers, O house of Israel.

And then will the revelations of Jesus Christ, which he has caused to be written by his servant John will be unfolded in the eyes of all the people.  Remember, remember, when you see these things, and consider them, then you will know of a surety that the time is at hand that the revelation of the apostle john shall be made manifest in very deed in the eyes of all nations.  

But Zion has said, the LORD has forsaken me. Today he will show you that he has not forsaken you.  For behold of this it is plainly written:

But, behold, Zion hath said: The Lord hath forsaken me, and my Lord hath forgotten me—but he will show that he hath not.

For can a woman forget her sucking child, that she should not have compassion on the son of her womb?  Yea, they may forget, yet will I not forget thee, O house of Israel.

Behold, I have graven thee upon the palms of my hands; thy walls are continually before me. Thy children shall make haste against thy destroyers; and they that made thee waste shall go forth of thee.

Lift up thine eyes round about and behold; all these gather themselves together, and they shall come to thee.  And as I live, saith the Lord, thou shalt surely clothe thee with them all, as with an ornament, and bind them on even as a bride.

For thy waste and thy desolate places, and the land of thy destruction, shall even now be too narrow by reason of the inhabitants; and they that swallowed thee up shall be far away.

The children whom thou shalt have, after thou hast lost the first, shall again in thine ears say: The place is too strait for me; give place to me that I may dwell. Then shalt thou say in thine heart: Who hath begotten me these, seeing I have lost my children, and am desolate, a captive, and removing to and fro?  And who hath brought up these?  Behold, I was left alone; these, where have they been?

Thus saith the Lord God: Behold, I will lift up mine hand to the Gentiles, and set up my standard to the people; and they shall bring thy sons in their arms, and thy daughters shall be carried upon their shoulders. And kings shall be thy nursing fathers, and their queens thy nursing mothers; they shall bow down to thee with their face towards the earth, and lick up the dust of thy feet; and thou shalt know that I am the Lord; for they shall not be ashamed that wait for me.

For shall the prey be taken from the mighty, or the lawful captives delivered?

But thus saith the Lord, even the captives of the mighty shall be taken away, and the prey of the terrible shall be delivered; for I will contend with him that contendeth with thee, and I will save thy children. And I will feed them that oppress thee with their own flesh; they shall be drunken with their own blood as with sweet wine; and all flesh shall know that I, the Lord, am thy Savior and thy Redeemer, the Mighty One of Jacob.

(Book of Mormon | 1 Nephi 21:14 - 26)

These things are written in the spirit of meekness and humility to touch the hearts of those who have trouble finding joy in the journey back home to our GOD as a result of mental infirmities. The LORD Jesus Christ knows exactly what we are  going thru, every feeling of sorrow we go thru. Mental infirmities is not a thing to be ashamed of.  It is like any other human disease. When the Lord came, Jesus Christ came to atone for our sins, he took not only our sins and death, but also our pains, or despair, our sicknesses and our mental infirmities so that his bowels could be filled with mercy, and so that he would be able know how to succor his people in compassion according to our infirmities.

I know that there are many children of the LORD in the world today, who are running to and fro seeking a sure channel and a stable anchor.  Our safety lies in repentance and our strength in keeping the commandments of GOD.  The commandments of our GOD are our sure channel and the LORD is our secure anchor.  Prayer and supplication is a must, a power that will shake the power of heaven in our behalf.  And I am here to light the way for those people that have a cloud over their heads and cannot see the light at the end of the tunnel, so that they know that they are not alone nor forsaken, and that they are able to have joy in the journey across the desert or the sea of affliction.  And it is my duty to show you the way, as the prophets show unto us the proper path to follow. That by coming to Christ in his restored church, even the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter day saints,  to claim their blessings, the will spirit of the LORD in their lives thru all time and even throughout all eternity. And this is the testimony of heaven that is in me.  For of these things it is written:

And he will take upon him death, that he may loose the bands of death which bind his people; and he will take upon him their infirmities, that his bowels may be filled with mercy, according to the flesh, that he may know according to the flesh how to succor his people according to their infirmities. Now the Spirit knoweth all things; nevertheless the Son of God suffereth according to the flesh that he might take upon him the sins of his people, that he might blot out their transgressions according to the power of his deliverance; and now behold, this is the testimony which is in me.

(Book of Mormon | Alma 7:12 - 13)

 And I pray that my faith and your faith does not fail in these perilous times. This letter comes to you directly from a broken vessel, even an unworthy servant in the hands of Christ, that has great anxieties for the welfare of your souls. It tortures my soul to know that any soul may perish in their sins and be confined endlessly into a living hell in this life or in the life to come. Of these things I boldly testify in the sacred name of Jesus Christ, amen.

Yours Truly

Miguel Angel Tinoco Rodriguez.